Monday, February 23, 2009

Why Be Hateful?

Okay, I really don't plan on this blog being a forum for my ranting, but I really need to vent and pass the word.

I don't understand how teenage girls can be so incrediblity cruel! I have never come across meaner or more hateful people in my life than a couple of local girls who are are sending threatening, hatefilled texts to Sami. She finally came to me last night and told me about what was happening. Wouldn't you know it's all over a boy. Sami is friends with this boy, they chat on My Space (which I monitor), they text each other, but have never dated. Well his old girlfriend decided that she didn't like it and she and her friend started in.

I saw messages both that were sent and received by Sam. She kept saying that she didn't understand why there was a problem. All she wants is to be this boys friend. The messages just got worse.

I talked to the mother of one of the girls and she yelled at me and told me that teenage girls are just mean and she won't get involved in her daughters problems and this is not a big deal. BIG DEAL!!!??? Of course it's a big deal. Her daughter is threatening mine. She and her friend know where we live and where Sami works. I could not believe what I was hearing from this woman. She said, "What do you actually expect me to do about it?" Well, ummm. . . let's think. . . be a mother! Hold your daughter accountable! This just blows my mind.

Now I have the police involved (what choice do I have now). I'm calling the cell phone company to see if I can get phone records. The school that the girls attend will be involved as well.

I don't want to be a freaky, over-protective mother, but I have to do something. I was awake most of the night, both hurting for my daughter and wondering how far to take this in order to teach these girls that what they are doing is first wrong and second illegal.

Please, please, if you have teenage girls, tell them that being hateful not only hurts the victim, but it will ultimately hurt themselves and their parents.

One thing my kids know and know well is that the choices they make don't just affect them. And that there are consequences for all the choices we make. We get to choose. . . will the consequences be good or bad.

Please pray for my family, but mostly for Sami. She is so hurt and upset.


Kisa Peters said...

OH Man Stacey - I'm sorry for this rough time with your daughter. My daughter is only 12, but she's a girl......and growing up girl is HARD! I am shocked that the other mother is of no help! I mean, I do agree that girls can be mean, but girls can also get their phones taken away and be grounded and monitored more closely and reminded of what is RIGHT and what is WRONG - I hope the steps you are taking take care of this problem - and I hope your daughter doesn't have to worry any more. I will be thinking of you and your family!

Julie Koerber said...

I'll for sure say a prayer for your family. I'll also hope and pray that those girls hearts are softened. I can't believe that mom's response! Hugs to you!

Danielle said...

I will be praying for Sami, and for your family. I know that it can take a toll on everyone. Bless her heart. We have went through the same thing, and in the end Callie came out stronger than she ever was. But it's still tough when you are in it. I pray that God will reveal to these girls what ignorant decisions they are making.
Much love~~~~ Danielle

pepsigirl said...

Oh I'm so sorry you are all going through this! My dd started Junior High this year, and I know how mean girls can be. I do not think you are over reacting at all! We have every right to demand safety for our children! From the sounds of it, that "mother" is part of the problem. I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers~ ((hugs))

Jamie said...

Stacey that is horrible that this is happening, but I think you are doing the right thing. Big Hugs for you and Sami, I will definetly keep you guys in my prayers!!

Jami {sgtStamper} said...

I don't know what is more troublesome - the awful behavior of these girls or the reaction of their mother. I wish kids could see that the things they say to a computer or text into a phone has a real impact on the other end. And it IS a big deal!

Sami is very lucky that she has a mother that cares so much for her!! You are both in my prayers. {{hugs}}

Stacy Cohen said...

Oh wow, Stacey! I'm so sorry that your daughter is going through this. You did the right thing by getting the police involved. It's so sad to thing that anyone can be that mean, and it's HORRIBLE that the girl's mother didn't even care. I hope it all gets resolved soon! I'll be sending good thoughts to you and your daughter.